Rab Corbett
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Rab Corbett is the name of a persona that made a number of prank calls in Scotland at some point in the mid-1990s. Using the Scottish vernacular and copious amounts of swearing, the calls were mainly directed at businesses in and around the city of Glasgow, Scotland and have achieved cult status in that country.
Very little is known about the origins of the calls, who made them or for what reason. Some have suspected that the calls were made by a Scottish TV or radio personality, notably Radio Clyde's George Bowie, but no proof of this has ever been found on the Internet and many consider the difference in accent sufficient evidence that it must be someone else.
The calls were initially forwarded between friends on cassette tape before being converted to MP3 and RealMedia files and being posted on the Internet a few years after their initial circulation. Nowadays they are common as ringtones within certain sections of the Scottish population.
The caller also uses the names Charlie Joe, Dr Raymond McKenzie in one of the calls and refers to his mother as Mavis Corbett.
[edit] Transcript of Snudge
| Phone rings twice. | |
| Garage | Hullo. |
| Caller | Awright bawbag? Look, ah've got a problem, but it's your fuckin' problem now 'cause ah need a bonnet — for ma motor. What you got for me? 'Cause ah put it into a lamppost. |
| Garage | Wha'? |
| Caller | Ah put it into a lamppost, and ah need a bonnet now. |
| Garage | [perplexed] |
| Caller | You got one? It's a Nissan Cherry. |
| Garage | A Nissan Cherry — wha' year? |
| Caller | Ah? Ah don't know — it's an E — E–reggie. |
| Garage | You got an E–reggie Cherry bunnet, Snudge? |
| Caller | Snudge! |
| Garage | . . . Wha'? |
| Caller | Snudge! Is that his name? |
| Garage | Aye, how's that . . . ? |
| Caller | [interrupts] It's a fuckin' stupid name. |
| Garage | A bit like you, then, eh? |
| Caller | Hey! Don't you start with me, ya poofy prick! Lose the attitude! |
| Garage | [excited] Who're you talkin' to, ya fuckin' ride?! Don't you . . . |
| Caller | [interrupts] Hey! Don't you start! |
| Garage | Ya prick! |
| Caller | Aye! Ah know who you are! |
| Garage | Dae ye! |
| Caller | Aye! Yer that poofy lookin' guy wi' the dark hair! |
| Garage | An' you're a wank! |
| Caller | Ah how? What do you say? Don't you start that wi' me! |
| Garage | An' wha' you gonna do, ya fuckin' ride? |
| Caller | Hey! Are you gonna get me this bonnet for me, or what? |
| Garage | Ah'll put a bunnet o'er your heid, you start yer attitude wi' me, ya fuckin' ride! |
| Caller | Ah'll take a hammer tae you! |
| Garage | You'll take a hammer to who?! Ya fuckin' prick! |
| Caller | Ah'll take a hammer . . . ah! [defeated] |
| Garage | Yer a wank! |
| Call ends. |
