Wikipedia:List of cabals
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This page contains material which is kept because it is considered humorous. It is not intended, nor should it be used, for any research or serious use (unless the research is about Wikipedia itself). |
This is a list of the cabals which dominate Wikipedia, ruthlessly abusing its content for their own evil purposes. All of these cabals control the encyclopaedia, and dictate its content, although it is unclear how all the different cabals can each control Wikipedia at once. It is likely that there is One True Cabal which secretly controls all the other cabals, but no one yet knows which cabal is this master-cabal.
Many brave martyrs have risked their editing careers, nay, their very lives to expose these cabals. If you are aware of any other cabals, please add them to this list.
| Name of cabal | Description | Where identified |
|---|---|---|
| 1.0 cabal | This alliance of "credentialed experts" aims to remove the openness of Wikipedia and only allow its own members to edit. | [1] |
| anti-Red Faction cabal | This "self-congratulatory" cabal, formed to destroy User:Lir, is now the mortal enemy of "the children of Lir". | [2] |
| ArbCabal | This group controls the ArbCom. Cunningly, the "Arb" stands for both arbitration and arbitrary. | [3] |
| Australian cabal | Strewth! Led by |
[4] |
| Barbeques cabal | This group wants to see all vandals roasted. Or skewered and turned on a spit. Failing that, at least, can wikimeetups be held at places that have good BBQ? And no, no member has ever said "Put another shrimp on the barbie". You're thinking of the Australian Cabal. | [5] |
| Catholic cabal | Operatives of this cabal remove all reference to its existence; the WikiPope is elected in pectore by those who have received the rouge hat. Glory be the the Founder, and to the Admins, and to the Holy NPOV, Wikipedia without end. Amen. | [6] |
| "CENSOROUS POV BIGOT" cabal | This cabal was apparently opposed to editors who liked to write IN CAPITAL LETTERS often. The cabal went underground after Jimbo announced that all ABUSIVE POWER GRABS were scheduled for June, not April. | [7], [8] |
| CIA cabal | "Staffers of the Wikipedia online 'encyclopedia' - now one of the most dominant media websites in the entire world - show signs of being CIA-type operatives, directly engaged in US-funded propaganda operations against US citizens." | [9] |
| communist admin cabal | The rougest of the rouge, this cabal of admins exists to protect the pedophilic cabal (see below). | [10] |
| deletionist cabal | This cabal infringes on the right of all Wikipedians to add completely unverified and speculatory material to articles. Down with deletionism! | [11] |
| developer cabal | This cabal was first mentioned by Jimbo as a possible check on the power of the sysop cabal (see below). There is no confirmation that it exists, but of course it does, even though it does not exist. | [12] |
| Esperanza Cabal | A Wikipedia domination project based on friendliness (they make you offers so gently that you can't refuse). | [13] [14] |
| groupthinking cabal | This cabal also enjoys "juvenile insults", "power-tripping" and long walks on the beach. | [15] |
| inquisitorial cabal | This rather vague and non-specific cabal heinously forces users to be accountable for their edits. | [16] |
| interwiki cabal | This cabal is run by en: admins who use their evil power to control other language wikis. | [17] |
| ivory tower cabal | A brotherhood of historians who slavishly follow historical orthdoxy. | [18] |
| Mafia-style hostage-taking cabal | After assassins failed to eliminate the GodKing, this cabal was formed to take the database hostage for ONE MILLION DOLLARS. Brion has been repeatedly approached to join this cabal, but has always refused to join. | [19] |
| master cabal | This shadowy group limits the influence of its enemies by locking the database from editing. | [20] |
| Mediation cabal | This cabal sneaks in and ruins perfectly good flamewars. | [21] |
| MexiCabal | Furthering the Mexican agenda on Wikipedia | [22] |
| Michael Jackson Cabal | A group of radical worshipers of Michael Jackson, whose edits often hurt the article. | [24], [25] |
| musicabal | Though not usually recognized as dominant, this treblesome group supports each other for adminship and featured article status. Will horn in on any situation, drum up support, and back up their position with violins if necessary. (Or worse, violas.) | [26] |
| name-censoring cabal | This cabal bans users because of their usernames. The reason why they do this, according to [name censored], is because they have failed to read every single message ever posted to the mailing list. | [27] |
| neo-Maoist Great Proletarian cabal | This "cyber-inquisition" is at the heart of the "techno-cult of ignorance", which aims to suppress completely legitimate branches of science such as Aetherometry. | [28] |
| open and friendly cabal | This cabal welcomes anyone who can "write some articles, act reasonably, don't be *too* self centered and sarcastic, [and] join the mailing list." Obviously it is some kind of sinister trap. | [29] |
| pagan cabal | This group kills off articles one at a time by ritually sacrificing NPOV, presumably in some kind of unholy ceremony. | [30] |
| RfA cabal | These admins control RfA, so that only their friends are made admins. They also issue "some kind of certificate you hang on your wall, much like a diploma." | [31] |
| Rouge admin cabal | These rouge admins, based on the flimisiest of grounds - policy and consensus - require not The Truth(TM) but what is verifiable. Do not confuse them with the Sysop Cabal. | [32] |
| Saddam Hussein embarrassment cabal | This group of users aims to make Saddam Hussein look silly by calling him by his name. Apparently he should instead be referred to by his offiical presidential title. | [33] |
| secret cabal | The members of this cabal issue "sealed proclamations" declaring that certain users are banned. Obviously members of the cabal, and admins who enforce the bans can read the proclamations, while other people cannot. Perhaps they are written in some kind of invisible ink, and cabal members are issued with special glasses to be able to read them. | [34] |
| secret-mailing-list cabal | These people communicate exclusively by means of secret mailing lists to which only they have access. Nothing more is known about them, because no-one else can read their emails. It is highly likely that they talk about very interesting things. | [35] |
| sysop cabal | These rouge sysops are the enemies of the developer cabal who attempt to destroy them. | [36] |
| Team Peerage | This group of users exercise control over Wikipedia's naming conventions in a nefarious effort to ensure the proper presentation of nobles and nobility in articles. Unlike most cabals, Team Peerage operates openly from their headquarters at WP:PEER. | [37] |
| Texan Cabal | This cabal has its evil lair somewhere in Texas. The Texan Cabal claims to be dedicated to social bonding through nefarious and nonsensical activities, but due to the size of Texas its true intentions and activities are hard to track. | [38] |
| Wales/Essjay Cabal | This "wiki-age-ist" cabal deceives innocent users into believing Wikipedia is an "encyclopedia," and violently represses the right of new Wikipedians to add useful information to Wikipedia by deleting it as "unencyclopedic." | [39] |
| white-collar American cabal | This cabal, comprising all white male American editors, is particularly opposed to communism. They edit all articles related to communism in order to push their POV. It is unclear how this cabal and the communist cabals can dominate the same articles at the same time, but clearly they do. | [40] |
